I have a hypothesis that there are two types of Housewives fans: those who would prefer just to check out the fashionz and watch a 30-second sizzle reel of any major developments.
Lisa just dropped “Cameron mortgaged his house and gave Mary $300 grand.” Rewind to one month earlier — Lisa and Cameron are at lunch, where he tells her, “When Mary and Robert want money, they call church meetings and beat you down until they get what they want,” among other things.
Instead of trying to apply “oh, remember how I felt this way about Jen and had tons of facts and look what happened …” to Mary’s situation, she goes big ol’ tit for tat and says since no one believed her about Jen, she refuses to believe anyone about Mary.
Mary insists none of this would matter if Lisa were loyal, then says a bunch of vaguely threatening stuff about how Jen “messed with the wrong one” and “that’s where she is and why I’m sitting where I am today.” I don’t know; it could also be because nefarious activity at religious institutions gets real hairy from a legal standpoint.
These two gals have been battle-hardened by defecting from the Mormon church and spending six hours on a bus with Lisa’s dry tear ducts; crossing my fingers and toes they don’t fall for this nonsense.
They’ve seen each other less than a dozen times in two decades, and with their father’s passing, they compare notes to discover the life-path grass is always greener, even if it’s absolutely splattered in shit.
Lisa tells JB HUSBAND BOSS that Meredith booked a jet for the ride home, then tells Meredith and Jennie that Mary answered all her questions last night and everything’s great.
But I honestly think it’s even more damning in context? Mary’s performance here has me reaching for a bottle of Pepto, a cold shower, and an investigation into my life choices for engaging with this content.